Liz Lemmon: Tracey, it costs us alot of money when you pull these shenanigans.
Tracey Jordan: Don't patronize me with your Celtic slang, Liz Lemon. We have a Black president.
xplr: Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Maps
It was a grammar conversation I was having with my next door neighbor at home in...– -Kate Cooper of An Horse on the story behind the band’s name (via AfterEllen) I want that sweater.
If I ever see that bastard again, I swear I’ll jam a squirrel in him.– Mom (Futurama)
I taught my teacher something today.
She now knows what it means to be “rickrolled” and what a “meme” is.
Do not FUCK with me, you pathetic piece of shit
Guess what? Your friend IS reatarded. He smoked pot in school. I know we all make mistakes, but that was a fucking retarded mistake, which makes him….you guessed it; retarded. If his parents don’t want him in our house, then he can’t be in our house. I’ll be damned if our parents get in trouble because you want to get high in the garage. Hmm? What’s that? My...
I'm being Rickrolled at this very moment
Fucking karaoke in the cafeteria
A question for my brother's "band":
Are you guys even playing the same song?
How could I forget "Stick It"?! →
The ice baths, the total lack of a boyfriend/intrest in getting a boyfriend, the ice baths. I’m a bad lesbian.
Lindsay and Sam: game on! →
girlfriendisahomo: Facebook statuses have been changed. Sam’s: married. L.L.’s: it’s complicated. Surprised? We’re not. Excited? YESSS! Let’s see if it’ll last. *crossing fingers* WHY DO I CARE ABOUT THESE TWO SO MUCH?!?!?!?!
I'm teaching amir his abc's
thenewfilosofee: It’s going well. Aside from him pronouncing V like B. I was like, really amir? why would there be two letters that sound exactly the same? That doesn’t make sense. They even look different. You’re not the brightest tool in the crayon shed after all. He ripped the cards and went online, did some research and proved to me how i was wrong and sometimes letters are not making sense...
Facebook bans ad for lesbian film "And Then Came... →
So much worse than the new format.
FMyLife Moments in Greek Mythology
natmelfrankmoby: natface: apollosraven: mthrfknluis: interiormotive:flourhoneymilk: Icarus Today my father made wings out of feathers and wax so that we could escape the king’s castle. But I flew too close to the sun and the wings melted. I then fell into the ocean below. I can’t swim. FML Odysseus Today I came up with a plan that helped my country win a 10-year war. But, because I...
Why is there a new contestant from Britain's Got...
Good for them but if we don’t even care about the winner of America’s Got Talent after the show’s over, then why would I care about Britain’s contestants?
Aidan knows his "Die Hard"
Kevin: Why do you keep picking these guns, Aidan? Don't you know their guns are horrible? Who has the best guns, Aidan? Who?
Aidan: John McClane.
I just saw the promo for next week’s episode of Law & Order: SVU with Hillary Duff as a guest star. Her voice sounds the same way it did when she was 12….how unfortunate.
I'm a good dad- errr sister
I taught Aidan how to throw and catch a baseball today. Now excuse me while I reward myself with a beer. NOM
While waiting for her neighbor to back out of his driveway my friend said “he...– avocadosalad my new favorite tumblr (via thenewfilosofee) What can I say? I was given a golden opportunity and I took it.
Don Draper is in Kissing Jessica Stein?!
Sure it was only for 2 seconds, but he was there!